In transition....

After a slightly crazy weekend in Amsterdan, this week in London will be nice and busy! The whole world is in London these days. Meeting up with people from the past, the future, the present... all strange and true. For once, London feels a bit like singapore. Where having friends, means you have a life. Or does one really? Socialising every day outside work seems to be the most favourite past times people generally have. But over-socialising also means you leave little time for other things.

Anyway, it's just one week. And after this, we'll be in Spainfor 6 weeks, with 5 of those week again meeting new people, introducing ourselves over again and again. Then after, its back to Singapore!

Goodbye Phantassie, goodbye Scotland

And after 3 weeks and a bit, it's time to leave again. :( We really had a great time here. We're so happy that we had the opportunity to work with the local full time staff here. Liz the head gardener, who lives in a cottage on the premises as well. Rose, the assistant gardener also living in the caravan nearby. Tony, a part-timer and wwoof mom who just took care of all our wwoofers needs during our stay. He even got us extra pillows when we asked! Very grateful. And there's Fiona, & Louise, the stables ladies who pack the orders, Rory the very hilarious egg man, Luisa who does all the admin, Addie driver come cool music studio guardian, Cameron also driver come food forager (picked us some delicious mushrooms once!), Douglas our eccentric 70 year old chicken man who doesnt stop working, David who takes care of the grounds, James the handyman and mechanic... all wonderful East Lothian folk that we got to know and enjoy each other's companies. There's a lovely little comradery amongst everyone. A mutal understanding and feeling that we're just all in this together and let's get along and have a good time doing it. 'This'- meaning life in earth in general! Phantassie Organics is an unintentional community. And maybe that's the best kind, as it just grew out of different purposes and organically (excuse the pun).

Feeling sad we're leaving Scotland in general. It just dawned on me yesterday that we're leaving Scotland. Didnt expect that the land would have this affect of me. We'll be back.... we will.

This kind of completes our UK wwoof journey for this year. Started 15 June 2009, and wrapping up 22 Oct 2009. Started with the sun set at 10:30pm at night, and from next week, it will set around 6pm. The autumn leaves are stunning right now. And I feel a little bad for 'abandoning' this land we've been living on and travelling on for the past couple of months. I feel bad for not 'seeing through' nature that we've been following so closely for so long. And a little hypocritical to escape to Spain after this. Just when we were getting ok with the cold. Maybe thats why people don't plan ahead when they travel, but instead, just plan as they go. Then you will do what you feel like doing best. Next time... maybe next time.

Twinkle twinkle little stars

If I had to pick just one reason, only one reason why I prefer to live in the country and not the city... the reason has to be - the stars. Might have mentioned stars before in the blog, but it's truly one of those things thats quite out of this world (almost literally!) and worth mentioning all the time. In fact, its a wonder how we can forget about them during the day. When we look up in the sky, like in today's sky, we saw the bluest sky blue, and a few clouds made by aeroplanes. We dont see the stars because the sun's light overpowers. We forget that there are billions of other planets, galaxys, quite possibly intelligent life other than ourselves out there. During the day, we're pretty much thinking we're all alone in this. Going about our busy day, working, living, etc. Then at night, on a clear night, without any light pollution, the most spectacular show is put on display. More stunning, heart-grabbing, profound than any other 3D, special effects, fireworks display etc can ever try to create. The stars... oh my god. And if you have a wider sky above you, with less buildings and such,.. you get wider angle view of it all.

Think me whimsical, think me idealistic and foolish. But if you are not able to be astounded as a clear sky with stars, so clear u can see the white glistening band of the milky way, containing the billions of planets and solar systems, just like ours all sharing one galaxy (I think I got that right) and feel complete wonder, then I feel sorry for you. Coz that feeling is so real, so immense, gives me tingles from head to toe just thinking of the power I see before my eyes. We need star gazing once in a while to just set everything back to perspective. It does that very very well.

Tonight is one such night. So was yesterday. If it was less cold, I would lie outside to look at it for ages.

Singapore has no stars. You know what I mean,... we can't see them. We never do. There are probably 3 shining things we see, and they probably satelites. It's a sad thing to go through everyday life without seeing stars. And maybe we are the way we've become, is coz we don't get the chance to put things back in perspective as often as other places.

John Muir, bowls and brownies

We had quite a nice day off today... we went to Dunbar, one of the East Lothian coastal towns here. Had lamb biriyani at the indian local - yums. Then went to John Muir's birth place which was very inspiring! He's an american but scottish born naturalist and conservationist. He friggin loved nature and best of all, a great writer. He dishes out wonderful quotes about nature like 'I only went out for a walk and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found was really going in.' and 'What is the secret of the mysterious enjoyment felt here - the strange calm, the divine frenzy?' - he says about some wonderful woods or some mountains or something I'm sure.

Then in the afternoon, Ralph showed us wood turning, and we made 2 little bowls from blocks of 80 year old local ash tree. They are gorgeous! Heres a photo of them before we oiled them with olive oil:


Then I made brownies which I need to go check now!!!!!!! tata

An apple moment.

Today we pressed 1000 litre (or as Ris low might say 'little') of apple juice! It was fun, apple-y and juicy. We got to do some cider tastings as well. Yums. Our camera is completely f*$#ed. So no photos. But ahh if only I had a camera. Apples - a wonderful representation of autumn. The few weeks when the leaves turn crispy and fall down to the ground. Lots of rakes come out and start sweeping. It's been quite an apple-y 2 weeks with picking, sorting, pressing. I even baked an apple crumble myself for the first time in my life! Very easy.

It's crazy to remember how only a year ago, we moved into our little camden flat where we had a lone apple tree in our wee garden. And it burst into fruit in a week of us moving in which is really about now last year! (We moved in 3rd Oct last year). It was the first time I bit into an apple that only just fell from a tree. It was a pretty cool feeling. I've been having alot of those lately... that first experience of doing something you've never done before, and it etches a vivid memory of that precise moment forever and ever in my mind. And I was standing by the doorway of that little kitchen, I bit into the green apple, the crisp sweetness hit my tongue and I pulled it back into vision away from my mouth, looked at it, remembering the kitchen marble top in the background and with pure delight and amazement, I said ' Wow' this tastes friggin awesome! And what made it super sweeet, was that we didnt have to buy it with money! It was freeeee! weeeeeeee

Well, of course, nothing is really free. There's the cost of rental, soil, the original cost of buying the apple tree etc. But it felt nice that there wasnt a transaction of cash at the fruit level. I was 'closer' to my food that I would be if I bought it at Sainsbury. There was no orchard owner, no chemical fertilizer company, no machines to pick them up, no waster to wash them, no packer to pack them. No aeroplanes that fly them across oceans, no wooden crates needed to carry them in, no trucks to drive them to sainsbury, no staff to shelve them, no plastic bag manufacturer to package them. Just the apple tree a few feet from my door, the apple, and me. It is a quiet intimate feeling people have when eating the food we grow. The time & effort spent taking care of them from seed, to planting, to feeding it with good organic matter, sunlight & water. All the energy you put into it, you take it back when it goes into our bodies to nourish us. Being 'close' to your food doesnt just mean being physically close to them, but also in quite another level. It's not an emotional level, its something else. Could be spiritual? I think this is fundamentally why the foodies are the ones who want to grow their own food. It flows in your blood. The food we eat. amazing how people aren't bothered much about where it comes from eh? We've become so used to accept that it's ok to live your life at the end of long line of process and steps. The industrial age is at the most dangerous times now, the scariest thing being that majority of the world is oblivious to all that is so wrong! Just living our lives day by day, still accepting plastic bags at supermarkets, not recycling everything we can, eat junk food, because its so easy not to care. To ignore what doesnt matter right now...

What a rant... its only 7pm and its completely dark already. Summer is OVER. But this year, we're not feeling the depression of winter coming on. N-o-i-c-e.......:)

Finding a manageable path

Life should just be manageable shouldn't it?

I mean, the reason why there's so much stress, depression, mental breakdowns etc is essentially because life has become unmanageable. Whether it be your crappy soul destroying job, rising prices of everything except your own pay, illness of a family member, earthquakes or typhoons... there are heaps of things that can cause life to become unmanageable.

But basically, there are things that are in your control and things that aren't.

What's happening in today's world where Corporations (I use a upper case C because they are now more powerful than any one person or even God) run everything, have influence over everything like world policies, how much things costs (including our very basics like water, food, and of course property), how much we earn. Things have become too big, too unmanageable for little people to figure out what the hell has gone wrong. Issues have become so intertwined – politics, climate change, the banking mess. It's pretty hard for any one individual to know how to get out of this huge global mess we're in. Unmanageable.

Therefore, what we're probably trying to do is try our best to see k a more manageable life. Smaller scale stuff you know. In the words of Robert Dunn (our mushroom wwoof host) – 'Aspiring peasants'. I like that very much. But empowered peasants.

I probably will be looked down upon in Singapore if I decided to give up my career and become a housewife. its seen as a waste in a university education. But education shouldn't just be about getting a good paying white collared job. It's also very much about growing one's own ability to think and be critical and make choices in life that suits you best, finding your own voice and discovering what you believe and stand for in life. And there's so much joy, I've discovered in the simplest, manageable things in life. The freshness and smell of just-washed clothes. Baking muffins. Going for walks. Lying in bed in our caravan with your loved one. Making things with your hands. A warm fire. Writing. I would be content in my life if I earned a living doing manageable, enjoyable things and have extra time to pursue other interests like books, maps, travel, films, world injustice and equiping myself intellectually to make right choices for me and my family.

You must check out this book – Life Inc , I mentioned it in one of my earlier entries, but it's one of those light-bulb moment books. Read it! Or watch the streaming movie on the website.

Eric - our first scottish friend, said about us in the first hour of chatting - that Bjorn and I are Pathfinders (very world of warcraft i know!). Ones who always try and seek out their own paths and unwilling to comply with mediocrity. Lucky ones we are as well, as we are finding our own manageable paths right now, together. And having the opportunity, wwoofing now, to do so.

Its way more common for people in western europe and america to take a year's break from study and work to travel. And for people to live 'alternative' lives like having part time jobs instead of fulltime. Live in mobile homes across the country, moving when a place gets old and unexciting. Affluence in a society brings about choice and diversity. And is Singapore there yet? I believe we are economically, but our asian values and PAP-work-till-you-drop-so-you-can-get-your-5Cs brain washing makes it hard for people to do anything other than what Singapore has to offer. Which is to shop, eat, work, watch tv, party, get hdb flat, 2 kids, frequent short flights to bangkok, diabetes, heart disease, cancer, die. Wherears a care-free, simple life is deemed a wasteful, ungrateful and meaningless life...?! Do we need to become another Japan and wait for suicide rates to soar before we get people taking a break from life and doing stuff they actually want to?

What I'm saying, is that if there is a real real reason to be miserable and live a life you dont like (like u need to stay in a place to look after an ailing parent), then too bad, we feel sorry for you and you're doing the best you can yeah. BUT if you actually can control your life, but still not go for it and instead, blow loads of cash & go into debt for stuff like a car, plasma screens or that LV bags, then I say - Screw you. Dont say you're envious of what we are doing coz we dont need envy that isnt deserved.

Moon gazing, bikes and the lovely Scots

We've been here at Phantassie one week now and how time flies when you're having a good time.

The weekend was lovely. We tried to ride the bicycles to Haddington – a nearby village but the wind was so strong and bjorns bike had no gears or something. So we turned back. So what did I decide to do then? Take a nap! How lovely. We havent had a 'day in' for about 4 weeks now and its time we deserved one! Hear this – we're not just 'enjoying life' and 'relaxing'. We actually do hard physical work almost everyday and when I have a snoozy afternoon nap on a Saturday, its definitely well deserved!

That evening, Tony, our 'wwoof mom', said it was a good idea to go to the beach with the full moon! And what a brilliant idea it certainly was. There's something really magical about the moonlight falling on nature. The sand, the beach, the trees, the woods. Is all different at night time, yet the same. More seductive and alluring I would say in the moonlight. Only moonlight, no street lights! It was only the next day when I got an email from Mom that I realise it was friggin Mooncake festival! This festival is one that I always always forget when I am overseas. Its coz it doesnt havea definite date on the western calendar. But anyways, I am glad that we spent it gazing at the moon on a remote beach in Scotland. The same moon our dear friends and family gazed at all the way across the globe, eating their moon cakes and lighting their lanterns. Awww...

Pic of Tony, our wwoof mom – from Yorkshire and me:

Phantassie Organics feels like a well oiled machine. Its wonderful. The lines of vegetables are all straighted and they are on top of their weeding almost all the time. The rows are planted just far apart for you to walk on, or crawl on all fours to weed. Perfect system if you ask me. They definitely have something for us to learn and take away. Very inspiring.

And the Scots... oh the Scots. How lovely they all are really. I love the Scots. I love their accent, their friendliness, their warmth, their niceness. Their down-to-earthness. English people can be quite (I now risk offending any of my loyal English readers – please don't, we love you too, but there are differences!) polite and reserved. Especially at the dinner table sometimes. All the proper use of forks and things, how its not right to use your hands to eat and all that. Today, one of the phantassie drivers, a Scottish guy whose name I haven't learnt yet (with a lovely scottish accent) drank soup straight from the bowl and then grabbed a cracker and used it directly to scoop margarine from the tub. Love it. Utensils sometimes just come in between our mouths and the food. Why do we need them for? Lol. In our time here in the UK, it has been the Scots who were always first to strike a conversation, ask if we needed help for anything, open their homes to us, offer to beat anyone up if we were in trouble. And they don't just say it, they really mean it.

I hope this isn't going to the our only travels to Scotland, because the country is beautiful, and the people are beautiful. I'm quite smitten, and had my breath taken away a few times now on a few occasions. And that's quite a lot to say about a country. I feel.